so, i was reading a tribute to henri carrie besson – the father of photojournalism – and apparently in his later years he studied under a tibetan buddhist teacher. this made me smile greatly of course as it not only makes sense that ‘the decisive moment’ require a presence that is all too often the center piece of the buddhist teachings. as much as i can try to deny the presence of the teachings in my overcommittment to the business concept, the littlest reminders of the teachings bring me back to a place that makes me tremble […]

fate would have it that i am able to recall that the international buddhist film festival is happening and i was barely about to catch the final day of an photo exhibit. the exhibit was a collection of buddhist related works from pretty well known photographer such as steve mccurray and michael kenna. unfortunately, i was quite disappoint by the digital archive prints that was being display. i am not sure if it was the condition of the digital scan or digital printing process but it didn’t leave me much to desire in own medium of choice. […]

_germans are more fun than something least i forget, i must remain myself how it feels to be on the other side of the spanking stick. from the other side looking at another’s desire and turning away from the possiblity. i bring to my own attention my own attachment torwards form. form in music, poety, shapes and skin. i am such the elitist when it comes to these matters but they are nothing more than advance states of subtle illusions. lies that i tell myself that it’s better because it’s higher to like this kind of form […]

it depends on who and what time of day it is. some people want me to do more art. others want me to get a different career. while others just want me to get a girl and be happy. why is that people think that i live such a dismal existence because i am not jumping around with joy as if i am in love? they say, you’re working too much and have no life. you’re not paying yourself shit and you never life the house. what do you do for fun besides your 2 hours of […]

i feel like i’ve lost a lot of ground in the last couple of days. a lot of movie watching and too much substance abuse. granted, it’s the ‘holiday’ but that concept has completely gone out of the window for me. i don’t think my life will synchonize anymore with the general public. so, for once, i may write something more meaningful tonight after general consumptation of a number of buddhist blogs earlier today. it’s definitely interesting to read other people’s thoughts on their practice and struggles. although i am well beyond the uber slacker status as […]