i am pretty sure there was a point in my life where i imagine having a successful business and living a balance healthy life. so how do i constantly remind myself that i am actually living that ‘dream’ state and stop pushing forward. i guess the nuance is that the forth monument isn’t the issue but it is how where you apply that development. as i ease pressure of one throttle to a different throttle, i find myself in sort of new terrority. there are plenty of successful business type models that the ego compares itself […]

it’s been over 9 months since i did my last race and i am still recovering from a cold. i was thinking last night that race day is the modern day equalivent of going to be battle of sorts. obviously not as extreme but the anticipation, fear, pushing your boundaries, and the camderaire and the post race party. which is to say i do enjoy the experience quite a bit since most of the time i am doing most of my running alone. i am feeling pretty good about my approach to running as it could have […]

at point in my relationship with the ex, i took the time to spell out what i thought would be a healthy relationship. yes, intentions are nice but enrollment and embodiment is the work.
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i was chatting with a pen pal of sorts earlier today and she was telling me about her challenges of being successful yet coming home to an empty home. i told her i know the feeling all too well, now and in my early thirties as well. still, the loneliness now is less suffocating than before. i wouldn’t say it sucks, it’s there and it bites me once or twice a month but for the most part i go on my daily life feeling pretty content. more or less having a more meaningful purpose being a father […]