this poem by the sixth is partcularity revelvant to my life. not that i am comparing myself to such greatness but the tension between desire and non attachment is mind blowing sometimes. a friend describe my aversion towards woman as also monk like, a joke but alas partly true. that girl who’s stolen my mind – if we could be together forever – like the joy of finding a jewel deep in the depths of the sea. white teeth smiling. brightness of skin. on my seat in the high lama’s row at the quick edge of my […]

a couple of weeks ago, i donated some time to the tibeten aid project and we’re liking my events photos a bit. certainly nothing special in my eyes but i took upon myself to offer more of my time for the benefit of myself and the culture i cherish more than my own. for myself because doing time around people that believe in the path will remind me more forciably to get back on cushion. anyway, i went to their headquarters today to find out about a photo project that they have been trying to get off […]

_facing the wrong direction or not. it’s been a while since i mediated. i can’t remember the number of months but it feels like over a year. actually, i meditated last week and it felt refreshing but it would seem that my dominant disposition is one of very focused denial of everything that isn’t ‘work’. i was cleaning up my room tonight and all my plants are dying. it’s a pretty accurate manifestation of my relationship with my personal life. i am not suprised that things are dead or i don’t have any friends beyond my local […]

after watching jacob’s ladder, i was intrigued by the origin of my desire to rent the movie. after a little googling, i stumble upon the buddhist film festival website and i remembered the past again. i found the movie to quite amazing on a number of levels as it is a very complex script to portray on film. nonetheless, the director and writer did a great job in portraying the last moments of death as an illusion to what could have been and what was. naturally, i did more research on the subject matter and found a […]

i picked up a couple of books last month at borders and it’s a month later and i’ve cracked about 10 pages. it’s quite sad really because i get so much out of reading and yet i can’t ‘afford’ to find time. it’s definitely something i miss dearly and it because it’s not so easily consumable as music, it’s one of my great joys that will have to be scarfice in this time of intensity. anyway, i discovered the cliff notes of the book that i was meant to read in my 10 mins of spare cycle […]