in the past few months there has been a lightness that i have forgotten. there has been a notable shift internally and it feels really good and right. it’s easy to covet this feeling at a younger age but the sweetness in the the old age. like millionaires from the dot com days where you live the sweet life after 5 years of intensity and being at the right place. it’s actually nothing like that because the journey to this moment is filled with so many set backs. all those failures scar your being and then they rip up in ripeness when the time finally comes and then you start all over.
i’v been definitely getting doing the ground hog day experience of late. routines and pattens that melt the days together. the monotony of daily life. of course the irony of it is that i live such a glided life. the golden handcuffs are no worse or better, i just need to work through it.