i would confess for the last 6 to 9 months, i haven’t given much monetary donations in terms of street nor to non profits. i know i am on some great mailing list where non profits hit me up for money every week so it was rather almost shocking that i fork over $250 in less in 15 mins. maybe i had been feeling guilty for some time (or not as compassionate as i like to be) and i just needed a kick in the butt by a young attractive lady disturbing my dinner to get me to donate beyond my means. logically, i know that $250 isn’t a lot of money in the grand scheme of things but given my current financial situation, it does mean a tiny bit. i would prefer to donate my time but given that i have also very little time, it would seem that time and money are about the same to me. maybe it’s all part of my reunication process that i am going through now. i am at the beginning of my reunication process and although the tingle of regret lingers in the back of my mind, i’ve been able to quell it sufficiently enough to tell my friends that i am getting rid of my possesions. once i say something like that, i will not usually retract my words and i am sure my 3 day weekend will reenforce that even more. this first part of the reunication is the easy part, just a bunch of media but i am cheating a bit because i am digitalizing all my music for safe keeping. i can let go of the form but my attachment to the music itself is too strong at this moment. over time, i know it will become less significant in my life as it has already become quite less significant in the less 10 years.
maybe the incident that started this ball of reunication was hearing that yet another friend of mine was moving to new york. i was actually giving her a hard time about doing it when we last spoke at length and i am so proud of her for actually doing. there aren’t that many woman that i admire and have a quasi crush on but she would definitely be one of the few. anyway, time for me to stop talking about NY and start my exit strategy on at least some spiritual level.