sometimes the intensity of the toil makes me question the process and journey. there are very few people that actually appreciate and support the level of commitment that i have put into this great endeavor. it’s easy to bitch how taxing the process has been and even in the seeming success that we experience, it feels half empty. once in a while i have a good conversation with my over the hill art buddy (41 is definitely too late to do anything significant, don’t you think?) and we consider the alternative to our lifestyle as it is […]

in times of need, i consult the bible known as in the words of my perfect teacher. tonight, i randomly open up a chapter and lo and behold, i find a most appropriate text. i have met a sublime teacher, but let myself down by my negative behaviour. i have found the best path, but i wander on precipitous byways. bless me and all those of bad character like me that our minds by be tamed by the dharma. a series of seemingly unrelated circumstances have resulted in a potential turning point in my mind state. heavy […]