invariably, i have to censor myself for different reasons as some entries pertain to some of my readers. i should have been publishing more in the past month since so much has happened to me in a very emotionally positive matter. it was in part one reason why i had to recently notified a long time friend on the nature of my happiness. it was unfortunate that my happiness could adversely effect him so i had much to consider before finally communicating it. the main question was when was the ‘appropriate’ time and i am still unsure even after the fact. on one level, the action was self serving for it it lifted the weight of the burden from my mind. but on the other hand, continued silence would have simply protracted the suffering and deceptions.

 i got a massage today and i forgot how wonderful it felt to be touched by a skilled practitioner of the body arts. i think it would be a wonderful skill to have to give and share with a lover. so much to do and so much not to do.