so, i had so many brilliant thoughts when i was watching the band Low at great american music hall. i had done some pre cooking in preparation for the meta physical experience and it help faciliate the flow of creative properganda. concepts so outrageous that only true chefs would understand. but i digress for this is about about baking and meta musical trips into fairy land but about her.
for now, we are back at square one and i can’t understand the endless romantic confessions of my heart. and then it hit me; during the show, deep into my drinking ritual, deep into the core of spiritual malpractice. my ephiany reminds of the last scene in “crouching tiger, hidden dragon” where baldie/zen martial arts master confesses his love for the coolest asian sister over 35 after of the years of abstraction in the spiritual/martial arts plane. It’s the paradox of higher levels of abstractions can actually bring you closer to the rawness of emotions. as it seems, it is the gamut of abstraction and rawness that makes life enriching and she represents the specturm of anti-me that makes me feel whole. weird shit.
in addition, it’s the entire experience of totally being so deep in it that when i come back up for air, it’s so refreshing. without doubt, the emotional pain is a force of creativity which i’ve been so lacking before of being in the comfort zone too much. we’ve come to terms with her departure in three weeks but now, the relationship is to simply enjoy as much knowing that we have to let go and not hold onto concepts like ‘long distance hell’. somehow, i had faith that it was going to work out and it simply did.