another great causality in the war that never ends. it will be some time before the full damage comes into the light. it’s not about losing the physical being of the relationship that is so daunting. for there are so many more fishes in the sea but the movitivation of the search that yields that harvest that has lost another notch. in so many words, the faith of finding the soul beyond your soul has been shattered again. although the first and foremost is finding the soul within the self, the journey is no doubt glorified by another soul that pushes the discovery to levels unknown by the self. that is what makes the search worthwhile.
even as i must deal with my own suffering and lost faith, seeing the suffering in a moment of laughter outside yourself is a sneaky reminder that my wounds are ever so raw. but even at the height of the the bond’s glory that exist an under current of suffering that can be equally demoralizing. the absence of pain doesn’t mean the absence of suffering. i think i will finally stop looking back on the road to nothingness when i fully realize that life is suffering. the power of denial is unmistakeably awesome. but i digress, my tribute to tj is my renewed faith in his ability to fight the fight. even in war, the energy that shatters us can be redirected to a higher awakening.