patterns and convergence

it’s too early to tell how really major this past month has been but i know it’s big enough to warrant a level 5 analysis. in this analysis, we will look at the karmic conditions and pathogical parameters that have lead me to this most interesting junction in my life. first, female energy returns to the house of natoma and then mom randomly calls me after 10 years. and then, the 10 ton truck hits me and i am still picking up the emotional pieces from the highway of twisted destinies. even while the i am plotting […]

2014-12-31T23:17:34-08:00Tags: , |

abstracts

so, it’s been close to a week now since my awe inspiring weekend. the emotional high has stabilized and the undertow picks up momentum. so begins the first great obstacle but in overcoming the great, the strength of it shines. on matters of practical terms, the nature of the relationship is consistently ideal with the major constraints of the ‘working’ self. even more so, a palatable zest for life becomes eclipses the exploration of creative fantasies. questions remind and fear is at a bay but faith cultivates much hope. complexity seems like a common theme in the […]

2014-12-31T23:16:55-08:00Tags: |

where do i start

i may not ever publish this for some time but it’s quite significant that it makes into the blogsphere. anyway, i am still recovering from a shock to my emotional system from this past weekend and my attempt to express it in any medium will fall short of it. it would be foolish to suggest i’ve never had such intense feelings but at the same time, given enough experience, it would be not entirely accurate to suggest that what i am feeling is incomparable. granted, i haven’t felt much emotions and ‘aliveness’ in the past 3 years […]

2014-12-31T23:16:34-08:00Tags: |

completion?

things like this tend to happen when you least expect it. like falling in love and having kids. it’s not meant to be difficult (falling in love that is) so if you’re trying too hard, then maybe it’s not in the cards. so, it would make perfect sense that i would be married and have my 1.24 kid by now. that’s the first thing she asks me of course. it’s hardly surprising after 10 years of no communication that your parent would expect their eldest child to be quite on the way to marital bliss and parenting […]

2014-12-31T23:27:26-08:00Tags: |

of self and the ground

Do you think i know what i am doing? That for one breath or half-breath I belong to myself? As much as a pen knows what it’s writing, or the ball can guess where it’s going next.  -rumi   from the ground of ignorance the tree of self grows deeply rooted in the pond of murkiness the lotus of clear light settles to reveal -vm     

2006-06-18T11:43:47-08:00Tags: |
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