dec 18th
should be asleep but wasted the past hour browsing stupid dating websites. the physical practice is going well with yoga and running and biking but mentally, i still have a few bad habits that i still working on. i am keeping the faith that the mediation will do it’s thing as long as i keep it mostly consistent. it has been consistent more or less but there is still a desire to take it deeper. always deeper. my mind still keeps clinging into the future more often then i would like. for example, nowadays, it’s like, wait until i get that RV and i will have the time of my life. but the fact is, i am already having the time of my life. real time calibration. i like that concept. applying the fruit of meditation through awareness and changes in behavior in real time. that is where the pudding is.
dec 1st
first reflection log. trying to find new ways to establish some of the more challenging habits such as appreciation and a more reflective practice. it’s been a good year for new habits such as mediating more regularly and now even doing yoga. the next round of habits are not as easy to quantify but i think with beeminder and draft apps, i may have more advance tools to help establish the habits. so the first exercise is to figure out in my reflection practice, what am i reflecting on.
first thought that comes to mind is something that i’ve been wanting to do for years but dread working on it. drum roll…i want to express MORE positive verbal expression. in my reflection practice, if i haven’t achieved my daily goal, then i need to reflect on situations that i could have use. bonus reflection is what selfless deed have i done today. so those will be the two things i will focus on for next 3 months.