although i don’t feel busy, there are some things such as reading and writing in this blog has gone astray since the return of my lady friend. i am not complaining or anything, but i definitely feel like small things such as writing have suffered due to my time being spent in snuggle formations and the likes. it’s a small price to pay really but i had been really enjoying this creative outlet. alas, i had written an entry a couple of days ago but lost it all at the last minute when i press the wrong key.<\/p>\n
\nany way, life is chugging along and i finally went to my mentorship training program today. it was tough to sit through 4 hours of developing interpersonal” skills talk but invariably there was definitely some interesting bits of information i pick up. recently, i have been analzying why i get some defensive when i argue with people and the discussion today spark a plauisble answer. the trainer suggested people get defensive when the other party makes the other person responsible for their problems. for example, instead of “I feel depress because of these factors”. they say. “you make you feel depress because of x and y”. So, i can see why i would begin to be defensive about my behavoir because it has directly cause someone’s else problem. the lesson here is, yes people influence other people’s feelings but if one is responsible for one’s own feelings, then it’s much easier to deal with in a conversation. oversimplication of the matter but my recent discussion\/arguemnet with a DJ friend that pulled out of our party has lead to me to enter unproductive dialogue with him. The conversation reminded me a bit too much of my conversation with the lady friend that i began to suspect that my defensiveness is quite at play. I am glad i am more aware of this behavoir and i may have even stumble upon the root of my defensiveness. some how i recently realized that my relationship with the cousin that i lived with during my teenage years was most formative to my style of arguement. because he had always threaten me with violence (and i knew he could beat me up), my defense was my ability to think on my feet and defend myself with words. So, i can see how i developed a nasty ablity to be quite harsh with the words during my arguements. it was my weapon but now i need to get rid of that hatchet. time to grow beyond the threat of violence.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
although i don’t feel busy, there are some things such as reading and writing in this blog has gone astray since the return of my lady friend. i am not complaining or anything, but i definitely feel like small things such as writing have suffered due to my time being spent in snuggle formations and the likes. it’s a small price to pay really but i had been really enjoying this creative outlet. alas, i had written an entry a couple of days ago but lost it all at the last minute when i press the wrong […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[23],"tags":[40],"class_list":["post-344","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-thoughts","tag-random"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pb4m0Z-5y","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/344","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=344"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/344\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=344"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=344"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jack.orangephotography.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=344"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}