it was super nice to witness her going to holding on to my leg ever so tightly to dad, leave me alone. all within an hour, i saw how fear transformed into joy. i hope i was able to help that transformation!
I’ve been making more of an effort to enjoy the nightlife in oakland. Even though i’ve been here for over 2 years now, the exploration of oakland life has been very minimal. anyway, i took uma to the autumn festival of lights and we had a darling time.
it’s funny watching her play soccer. recently she started playing soccer in a more ‘formal’ setting, uniforms and all, and it’s so interesting seeing how her personality plays out in the field. already i see that’s she’s very cautious in general. maybe it’s a girl thing but i notice a big difference when is is around saya and she how confident saya is downing new and daring things. somehow my daughter has learn to be fearful of new things as she’s got hurt enough doing new things. anyway, it will be interesting as she gets more confidence in life and see the evolution from it all away back to these moments in time.
it’s our pretty standard ritual that almost every weekend that uma is with me that we go hiking in the hills with jonsi. even after a year of going on the same route in the hills i still find so much solace and joy in the hike. even though it’s only 5 mins away from my home, it feels like we’re deep in the forest and the smell and softness of mother nature just takes over. anyway, this particular day, i decided the carry the x100s and had some fun with her. the light worked out just perfect and i’ve added a few more pages in the big book of uma’s childhood.
so i’ve been more vocal about setting boundaries with uma about what is acceptable behavior, especially in regards to my role as a parent. maybe i am simplifying too much but i am hoping it gets through her her head at this point that when you don’t listen to dad, there are big consequences. for the most part, i feel like i’ve been too lax with her and she’s getting away with behavior that i feel like i need to curtail now before it really gets out of hand. in particular, talking back and crying until she gets what she wants has been a regular occurrence. my main course of action these days is withholding the ‘my ipad’ as she claims and threat of time out and then pulling her ears! although i have skip time out more often and resorted to pulling her ears enough that she just cries, ‘don’t count!!’. i think it’s sort of registering but it’s not consistent behavior modification yet. and unfortunately, i realize that consistently comes from me not being consistent with her. sometimes i do let her get away with the whining and other times i buckle down. i am thinking that if i was more consistent with the discipling then i wouldn’t have to resort to ‘extreme’ measures. my saving grace at the moment is she recently told me that she loves me despite me ‘more’ even though i pull her ears.